So, idk who you are OR where you are right now, but I feel you pulling on my energy like crazy, bruv! Not in an aggressive way, but in a “I didn’t know I loved you & now I don’t think I can live without you anymore” kinda way. And it’s kinda magical. I’m feeling butterflies. Who are you, Cutie Pie??? It’s giving: MINE!

I know EveryBuddy thinks I’m in love with them, and it’s true that I am, but it’s only because I’m in love with the WORLD! And all the world loves me. I am a co-creator of the Universe, after all. You get back what you give, and when you give true love, of course true love is going to come to you. So, whoever you are, come get haH! Don’t be shy, My Pretty. Love lifts us up where we belong.

It has rained a lot since I’ve been here. Practically every other day. Thunderstorm after thunderstorm, and I’ve been loving it. It’s been so long since I’ve danced in the rain. Takes me back to the Ohio days. Anytime it would pour me and my sisters—ok mainly me because I’m dramatic—would run outside and twirl around like Jennifer Love Hewitt in I Know What You Did Last Summer and look up to the skies and yell, “WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR, HUH?! I’m right here! Come and get me!” Ahhh, the good old days. Lol.

But when the skies finally parted and let the sunshine in, I went to bookclub at Kindred Stories, a black owned bookshop and community space in Houston’s Third Ward right in (or next to—idk, I’m not from here!) the Museum District which is such a cute area of town. I’m obsessed.

This week’s read was Post Traumatic Slave Syndrome by Dr. Joy Degruy. I read it a long time ago, around when it first came out, and was literally just tagging along with my cuz for a new experience, but the book essentially theorizes that the effects of slavery have had an intergenerational impact on the lives of modern day African Americans that today manifests itself into 3 categories: 1) lack of self-esteem, 2) persistent feelings of anger, and 3) internalized racist beliefs. As a transformer of generational trauma to generational healing myself, this topic and conversation was my cuppuh tea.

There ended up being about 12, 13 of us there—a really good turn out for da clerb!—and while, generally speaking, we all agreed on upon the overall notion of the lasting effects of slavery that still permeate the psychology of the African American family, there were many that took issue with Degruy’s approach of recounting what they believed to be common knowledge of Black history in the first hundred or so pages, as well as a sort of savior-y kind of tone in which she referenced various personal visits abroad to Africa and interactions with prisoners and others in which—according to them—her observations and solutions were very simplistic and idealistic.

Again, I haven’t read the book since it first came on the scene so I don’t recall the intricacies or particular stories, and, neither agreeing no disagreeing, simply posited that perhaps, sometimes, the most seemingly simple things are the most complex, in that not everyone’s baseline is the same. An example that was given was her visit to a prison where she spoke to inmates about what options they had available to them upon release, discussing various topics such as entrepreneurship & housing, and how they were all so grateful and eager to continue the conversation even after her time with them was up, but then ended the story with (something along the lines of) all she had to do was show them some basic human respect. Some clubbers took issues with it saying that she obviously did more than just show them respect by introducing them to these new ideas, and I suggested that maybe her baseline for respect was more.

And I think that’s the entire human experience, right? Everyone is not on the same level so what is “more” for some is “less” for others and that doesn’t make any one better or worse, but just simply that we all have different lived experiences, different educational experiences, different worldly experiences, and so sometimes you have to paint things with broad strokes or put things in simple terms, not as a means to diminish but as a way to somewhat suggest that maybe “doing more” as an offering of guidance, knowledge, and/or resources for someone who has less should, perhaps, just be the baseline because a rising tide lifts all boats.

Most of us took turns sharing personal examples of generational patterns in our families and things that we’re personally working on to heal our bloodlines. I touch on this topic in my own book, Godward: 99 Reasons to Love You, as you well know, but specifically in the name/chapter of Al-Warith, The Inheritor, where I talk about how—generally speaking—black families inherit generational trauma and debt while white families are passing on money & houses, and other real assets, and if we aren’t the change we wish to see and be the ones in our families to put an end to generational cycles that have done us absolutely no good, then what was the point of us being here? Is this what we want to leave behind for our children? Because I know for me, myself, personally, my kids are going to be inheriting emotional safety and stability, healthy communication & relationship goals by witnessing their parents (eh hemmm <me & their dashing father>) exhibit mutual respect, admiration, support, personal freedom/individuality, and financial security. They will never know lack. The Universe has infinite supply. (3 Magic Words)

I had to duck out to record my daily meditation so I missed the final 20 minutes of conversation, but it was such a lovely experience overall and I highly recommend any book lovers in the Houston area looking for community and conversation check out their listings to attend and see what other events they have going on. They have both fiction & non-fiction bookclub, so whatever tickles your fancy! I asked to take a group photo to commemorate such an auspicious occasion. Of course I forgot to include myself in the pic, but ce la vie! What’s the last book you’ve read and what book is top on your *must* recommend?

I loved this wallpaper by local artist Tay Hall

is somebuddy gonna matcha my peace?

It is mandatory after spending hours breaking generational curses to refuel with some matcha, so cuz took me for boba at this cute little shop called Tea Villa. It was giving hard core anime / k-pop vibes. Ooo, I just had a flash of deja vu. Cutie Pie, is that you???

Anyway, we caught them right before close and I am SO glad we did. Music makes me dance, but matcha, matcha, matcha puts me in a mystical trance. 😁

Thank you to cuzita for a delightful date night!

woosah wind down

I know Houston is a city, but it really is nice to be out in the country 😅 I can walk around barefoot in the grass (always gotta be mindful of the snakes!) and listen with my heart under the trees as the forest creatures chirp, quack, and rattle at me.

Ok, park, forest same difference!

But that’s all she wrote for tonight, My Sweets. As ever & always, you could be anywhere in the world, but you’d rather be here with me & I love that for you. For US. It’s giving: we got a good—nay, GREAT!— thing going. Why would we let anyone get in the way of this union? Tuh! Please, peasants. Dey can try, but dey is not duh vine. Anyway, let me stop showing my behind and get outta here. You be safe, ok? Have a wonderful rest of the week and an even wonder fuller weekend. And thank you forever, for being my friend. You a trill one indeed! Stay blessed EveryBuddy & God speed!

Love Always (& Besitos!)

barefoot in the grass, or, World’s favorite

is somebuddy gonna matcha my peace?

woosah wind down

bad vegan, or, leave me a loan

Family matters, or, she never shines alone