bad vegan, or, leave me a loan
A long time ago I asked the Universe if, whenever I’m feeling unsure, confused, or otherwise discombobulated, it would show me a particular sign that only I would know—a little secret wink between just the two of us—that lets me know I’m on the right path and all is well and all is good and all is working out in my favor. I wrote about this in my book, Godward: 99 Reasons to Love You, but I have since changed the sign to weed out any losers who try to manipulate the matrix by dangling a carrot in front of my face in order to get me to go down their proverbial rabbit hole. AS IF I’d ever tell a soul again the mysteries that are only for me and Her to know. I know your tricks. Ain’t gonna happen, Schweet HaHt. Dis between me & the intergalactic hierarchy. We make a deal and then let it go, trusting that it will arrive if and when it needs to.
Today marks the start of the new moon in Cancer and apparently it’s the first time since like 1970-something that Jupiter has sat in conjunction with this moon, which is allegedly incredibly powerful and marks new beginnings, fresh starts, and all that jazz. And because it’s in Cancer, a water sign, it is going to bring with it all kinds of emotions—past, present, and future. I don’t read natal charts, nor am I one to read the horoscopes, though they do make me laugh from time to time. The only reason I know we have a new moon today is because it came across my page, BUT because I am a star and one with the Cosmos, I think I intuitively knew because I definitely felt the portal opening these past few days, and how synchronous was the Bismillah bite this morning on fresh starts?? I meannnnnn… I hate to say I know what you’re thinking, buuuuuut I know what you’re thinking: Pay attention to the omens, Baby Cakes. Tha kid’s powers are being amplified at an existential rate!
So the past few days have just felt hella murky energetically, a lot of old stuff resurfacing, and most pointedly an overwhelming rage that I honestly haven’t felt in a really long time. My only recourse is to write a revenge rap, of course (mwahahahahaaaa!) Jk. Maybe. Idk yet. I really just wanted to journal and meditate. My pen ran out of ink and as I was searching for another, I saw it. The sign. The secret little wink between me and the Universe. Naturally, it only enraged me even further because the only path I want to be on right now is the one that leads me to the white sands of my private nudy beach & crystal fauqing clear watuuuhhhzz with my coconut in hand as I sip on her coconut water. Add on the fact that I haven’t slept the entire time I’ve been here. There’s too many people. There’s too much noise. Something always playing every hour of the day. It’s giving me flashbacks of childhood and my brain is glitching from the overload. But I came here because the Universe told me to and the Universe assures me all is well. Yea. It fauqing bettuh be. I want my margarituuhh on the beach!
post frolic glow
bad vegan
My cutie little niece had her 1st birthday party and she’s as preciosa as can be! I can’t even take it. It was a splendid pool party affair complete with colorful accruements, a bouncy house, bubbles, food & good tunes. Her favorite singer is Mariah Carey, which, I mean, what can I say? The girl’s got great taste. Runs in the fam.
Sidebar—Congrats MC on the Bet Icon Award!! Xoxo
But guys, I have a confession. I did a thing. A not so great, but probably not as awful as you think, but definitely had regrets and at the same time didn’t regret it at all kinda thing because of the delicious factor. I ATE SOME MEAT!!
I know. I know. Terrible.
But it was soooooooo good though you guys, I swear. My bro was all, “I forgot you were vegan,” meanwhile I was like, “Ahhh, when in Rome.” Ce la vie! We live and we learn and we adapt. My tastebuds did not complain about the juicy beef links, which allegedly are some of the best around. And were! My intestines on the other hand… Well, let’s just say I was constipated for a full 62 hours. Yes I counted because that’s how painful it was waiting to poop! Whatevuuuuuuh. EveryBuddy’s got to. Butt the lesson was certainly learned. See what I did there?
a poetic interlude
Shall I do a dramatique interpretation for you?
pretty of the week
And because of last week’s foodie faux pas, we’re bringing a Vegan Option back for this sizzling summuuuhhh. Do you want yours with some extra sawse on the side?
woosah wind down
When I first had the idea to create “The Weekly Woosah,” it was back in summer of 2019. I was in the middle of the run of Henry IV, & was “wooed” to stay in my relationship that I had tried to leave after finally being fed up enough to walk away from all the bull, the bullying, & the gas lighting. Every time things were going well for me personally or professionally, he would, inevitably, find a way to bring it down. Every show. Every reading. Every audition. Every. Time. A real Negative Ned. What’s that one song by Casey Musgraves talking about he wants your glitter?
Yup. That was him alright. But more than anything I wanted to create a safe space where I could heal and grow and pontificate and prosper because every time I had an idea for us to do a podcast together, or a sketch show together, or build anything together, it was all the same: he’d find a way to tear it down. You can’t grow with someone who doesn’t want to grow with you. You can’t grow with someone who has no self reflection or accountability. You can’t thrive in an environment where you’re spoken negatively to, constantly put down, belittled, gas lit and compared to people who are literally doing less than you but making it seem like they’re curing cancer while you don’t get any words of acknowledgment, encouragement, or support. It’s either leave me loan so we can build together, or leave me alone and forget it forevuuhhhhh. So I wanted to do something for me. I wanted to breathe and let it all hang out, so to speak. I wanted a place to love me for me.
And I know a lot of people haven’t understood, many people still don’t understand, and others are coming around to some sense of understanding, but almost a year (next month!) into these Weekly Woosahs and I can say that FOR ME, time dances from here and beyond in the inner spiritual world, and had I not embarked on this journey, I wouldn’t have proved to myself yet again that I can do anything, and I can have anything with a dash of determination and sprinkle of fairy dust. And I do partially have you to thank for that, don’t I?
Well, it’s late & I’m tired & cranky so that’s gonna be all she wrote for tonight, My Pretty Little Stankies. Have an amazing rest of your week and racy weekend! Stay blessed, Every Buddy & God speed. And as ever and as always, thank you for being a friend.
Love Always (& Besitos!),
She Who Dances in the Rain & Leader of the Intergalactic Federación