Isn’t it strange that when you’re doing well and in need of nothing, people come out of the wood work to encourage you and give you things? Whereas when you’re holding on for dear life, the only thing people wanna give you is a snarky, “Keep holdin’ on.” Why is it that the absence of need overflows your cup, but the moment you fall into a feeling of necessity, everything dries up?

March fourth.

Today’s date & what we also must do, even when it seems there is no way forward. March forth. Even when it’s a tough battle up a steep hill. March forth. Even if you gotta ride solo just to rebuild. March forth.

Because who knows what’s on the other side? Who knows if even when you make it to the top of that hill that that’s the last hill you gotta climb? What if it’s just the beginning and just as you catch your breath and drink your fill at a Godsend of an oasis that magically appeared out of thin air, just around the riverbed lies a mountain just up ahead? You probably already saw it. One doesn’t typically miss a mountain staring them in the face.

But what continuing, what building that endurance does is steady you for the road ahead, for the mountain still to be climbed. Because now you’ve built up the stamina necessary to withstand the heights you still have to go, but what you learned at the bottom is unquantifiable, because not everyone has the fortitude to hunker down and mine for gold.

I was out walking this morning and saw this ginormous caterpillar. I almost stepped on it and then in a split second I looked down, saw it, and levitated over it. Since then I’ve seen quite a few. Must be butterfly season. Well, yea spring time. Duh. But the caterpillar into a butterfly is always a great metaphor for transformation, for new life. You have to go through the ugliness of growth & uncertainty—caterpillar stage—in order to emerge as ethereal as a butterfly floating on the breeze with seemingly no care in the world as it flits from one flower to the next and flirts with whatever butterfly that gets caught up in its tailspin. The li’ul minx that one, innit?!

Anywho, point being, the growth stage is painful and change doesn’t happen overnight. But one day, after many days, months, and sometimes years, of the seeming monotony of doing the same thing everyday but getting nowhere, something clicks. Something about you is different. Something about you is moving different, hearing different, seeing different, responding different, making different choices. Something shifted. And you didn’t even notice until you look back and only see one pair of footprints in that desert sand when it shoulda been two, but whole time God was carrying you and your pain right on through, unbeknownst to you.

Sometimes God sends me messages I didn’t ask for. Little (LOUD) nudges from the Universe guiding me in a direction I didn’t necessarily ask for direction on. And that’s the frustrating part because, according to me, my mind was made up on the matter, never to be thought of again. But according to God, He has the final say so we go according to Him. I repeat: this is the frustrating part because if you don’t do what He’s asking (demanding) of you, He’s literally not going to leave you alone about. But the Beauty of God is the (S)He will never lead us to something that isn’t for our collective & individual betterment. So, the question becomes, are you going to take my hand and walk with me, or do I have to go get my reel and fish for you?

Have you heard the news? Bismillah & Bonappetit is starting to make scents now! Look good, smell good, with our primere body oil featuring 100% pure oud & rose oils. This proprietary combination is giving both salt of the earth and heaven scent. Get yours while supplies last.

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What’s happening in your world? Are you happy? Are you fulfilled? Are you savoring the joi de vie? Or does every little thing get you all riled up and deprived from sleep? Don’t let the bastards get you down, My Pretties. We’ve got a lot of work to do!

Anywho, I’ve been having a grand old time here in the middle of nowhere. Who woulda thought the kid would find so much peace? It really is the little tings, my dear. When you relinquish control of the things you truly have no control over, God shows His hand and lets you know He’s bean steering this thang the entire time.

Not the beach, but the views are immaculate.

In other news, I had a hot date! Do you want all the juicy deets? Too bad! Bwahahahaha. A little privacy if you please! I will say we had a nice little rendezvous at The Inn, and dinner was a 10 outta 10. Check my foodie reel recap here. And what didn’t make the highlight but was also DY-NO-MITE was their date bread, available on the breakfast menu. Served warm with a smidge of butter (even though my body rejects dairy—hey, calculated risks) and some jam, this sweet treat was almost sweeter than I am!

Now I know based on my reel, some of y’all are probably like, “Hey! I thought you were vegan? What happened?” What happened is, I am all things, darling. I do what I want. And while my food habits are still largely plant-based leaning, admittedly, I don’t rep fa da vegans no mo cuz the way they was after my blood you would think they was carnivores! So, I let em’ have that. Just remember, before we eat, we say Bismillah & Bonappetit!

In global news, I am now the new ambassador for this chic li’ul jeweler known all around the world. They j’dore me and I, them. And honestly, that’s how everything in life should be. If you don’t love it, why do it? If you’re not going to be excited about partnerships—business, platonic, divine, iconic, etc—then why waste your time? Your people should be excited about you! And no, excitement isn’t the show of it—fawning all over you, being a yes man, and hanging on your every word,—but rather a calm & steady burn of enthusiasm. That’s what I’ve come to understand the meaning of real love is at my old age: a calm, steady, & unwavering burn of presence, appreciation, consideration, kindness, loyalty, openness, comfort, protection, meaning, adventure, thoughtfulness, compassion, accountability, understanding, and grace. Probably some more things mixed up in there, but you get me. But above all, love is patient. And love is kind. And if it’s neither of those things then it definitely isn’t mine. God would never give me a panzee who wouldn’t go to bat for me! Tuh! So I will wait until the appointed time for God to deliver Him to my doorstep. As if he doesn’t already know where to find me. 🙄 He must be tending to more pressing matters at the moment! I shan’t take it personal. I shall just pray for him and send him my love on the breeze.

And with that, I must bid you adieu, for I indeed have more pressing matters at the moment to attend to. I am glad for this li’ul check in though and see what you’re up to. Didja miss me? I missed youuuuuu. You could be anywhere in the world but you’d rather be my muse. You saucy li’ul minx you! I adore you. So until around this time next week, have an amazing rest of this one! And of course: God speed.

Love Always (& besitos!),

The Fisher of Men

Fisher of Men

blooming in death (valley)

i have you to thank