Have you ever experienced deja vu? A moment where you are absolutely certain you’ve experienced this moment before? Your future and present (or past) self are converging on the same timeline and for a moment you can’t quite pinpoint which one you’re in. Am I me? Was I me? Am I going to be me? No? Only me? Ok.

I’ve also had other moments of absolute, full body, resounding clarity. Pieces of a puzzle that I didn’t even know were puzzling all of a sudden click together and make perfect sense. And then life actually confirms it. But before that, an inner lightbulb goes off and I’m like, “Ooooooh.”

It’s been 8 months since my Mawmee passed on. I feel her with me everyday. It’s hard to reconcile sometimes. I was working so hard to try to get to her and then by the time I do, it was too late. Or was it? That’s the flip side. I was there in time to spend (practically) everyday of the last 3 months of her life with her. What a gift!

There are these owls hootin’ around property. I haven’t seen one yet, but others have, and I hear them all the time, night or day, just hootin’ away. That’s how I imagine it is with her. I can hear her voice, her laugh, her guidance, her annoyance, her reassurance. I just can’t see her anymore. But she’s there, in my ear, hootin’ and a hollerin’ away…

You know people think success and failure are what other people’s perception of your life is, but I would posit that success and failure is what you perceive it to be. <I write about this in my book> I could tell you a tale of great material success and zero personal happiness and I could tell you one of meager worldly means and an abundance of inner and external satisfaction. Which one would you like to hear?

No judgement on either, but we all have a right to the pursuit of happiness, whatever that looks like to you—as long as you aren’t harming anybuddy of course!—and I believe it is our God-given responsibility to go travel the earth, meet new people, experience new things, grow our wealth, grow our knowledge, grow ourselves. And we must also be dutiful when God provides, however it’s clear from the current state of things, that some people forgot Who provided for them. But just as the Lord giveth, the Lord can taketh away. And you know what you gotta do. You gotta fight. For your right. To parrrrrrrrdaaayyyyyyyyy!

I played golf over the weekend in a memorial tournament. That was my first time playing the full course! Well, almost. I think we made it through 15 or 16 holes of the 18 holes before we got called in for eatin’ time. It was pretty cool, I cannot tell a lie. No, like I think I’m officially a golf girl now for real because it is so good, so fun, so relaxing, yet so precise, broad strokes with a specific style of execution. The game intrigues me. I’m in. She needs some work though. She needs some work, so gimme a minute, will ya? I would also like to take this moment to note that my partner did in fact carry us all the way through. But who was keeping score really? ( I would’ve but Idk how) It was all for the love of the game!

I don’t think I’ll ever get over the mountains. Every which way you turn, depending on the light of day, these towers of earth look like absolute, cinematic genius, and God is the mastermind behind it all—director, writer, cinematographer, editor, producer, talent, agent, and manager. And the picture will have you falling to your knees in reverence. Truly astounding. Awe-inspiring, really. I could stare at them all day. I’ll be so hard on myself, on God, and then I have a moment of sweet revelry like I had staring at the mountains this mornings and it’s like, maybe this is the point, to stand back in and reflect on the Majesty that created something so magnificent. How Great must that Being be?

I popped into this little coffee shop while I was in Vegas for—story for another day—and anywho, I was like, I could go to the bathroom now or I could wait 15 more minutes until we get back to the spot. But then I was like, well, I do gotta go so, no time like the present, so I ask the lovely barista to point me in the direction, and you guys, the wallpaper when I walked in…

*A synchronous moment with the Universe: You are where you are supposed to bee.*

You know a gal’s got to have her cuppuhhh, and speaking of, it is time for my night cap; a spoonful of honey to catch a buzzzz before I retire. Don’t worry. I’ll save some for you, My Sweet. Wherever you are, wherever you may be, you could be anywhere in the world, but here you are with me. And I love that for you. And I love that for me. Have an excellent rest of your week. Stay blessed, EveryBuddy, and Godspeed.

Love always (& besitos!),

fight for your right

second star to the right